Your fear might be evidence of faith in use
“In the month of Nisan, in the twentieth year of King Artaxerxes, when wine was before him, I took up the wine and gave it to the king. Now I had not been sad in his presence. And the king said to me, “Why is your face sad, seeing you are not sick? This is nothing but sadness of the heart.” Then I was very much afraid. I said to the king, “Let the king live forever! Why should not my face be sad,when the city, the place of my fathers’ graves, lies in ruins, and its gates have been destroyed by fire?” ”
There are a series of people in human history that I have an extra dose of respect for and from time to time, I have considered framing portraits of them and hanging them around my office for inspiration. And if I had to boil down the essence of my admiration for these historical figures, I would say that my admiration of them springs from the fact that they were people of great faith that coupled their faith with brave or unconventional action.
Nehemiah follows that pattern and as this chapter opens up, we're shown a picture of Nehemiah fulfilling his role as the king's cupbearer. This was a trusted position and Nehemiah would taste the food and drink of the king to make certain it was safe for the king to consume before he ate it. Nehemiah was fulfilling this role like always, but the king noticed something very different about Nehemiah's facial expression. Nehemiah was indeed sad and heartbroken over the condition of Jerusalem, and the king inquired about this.
So in this moment, the most powerful man on earth asked Nehemiah to share from his heart. He wanted to know what was troubling him. We're told in this passage that this moment prompted fear in Nehemiah's heart, but he answered the king anyway and he respectfully explained to the king that the city of his forefathers was in ruins with gates that had been destroyed by fire.
This is an interesting way for this chapter to open up. It's clear that Nehemiah had a heart for what mattered to the Lord. It's also clear that Nehemiah was a man of faith, prayer and action as we'll continue to see. But we're also given a very "human" or down-to-earth kind of glimpse of Nehemiah in this passage. In his own words, he says that he was "very much afraid." What do you think about this? Can a person be both fearful and faithful?
It's clear from Scripture that the Lord is pleased by faith, (Heb. 11:1-3, Gal. 2:20). So what place can fear play in the life of a believer? Does it somehow make you less of a believer if you experience fear? Was Nehemiah spiritually immature because he wrestled with fear?
The truth is that in many cases, the presence of fear may be evidence of our faith being put to use. We're stepping into unfamiliar territory, we're fighting our natural instincts, we're placing ourselves in a spot that causes us to be stretched beyond what we've been accustomed to. If you're listening to God's voice and taking steps of faith as He nudges you, the presence of fear might actually be a form of confirmation that you aren't shrinking back from your mission to safe and familiar places. I'm not saying fear is a good thing, but in this kind of context it can be evidence that we're fighting against our natural impulses so that we can do the very thing God is calling us to do.
““To fight fear, act. To increase fear - wait, put off postpone.””
Your prayers don't have to be long to be genuine
“Then the king said to me, “What are you requesting?” So I prayed to the God of heaven. And I said to the king, “If it pleases the king, and if your servant has found favor in your sight, that you send me to Judah, to the city of my fathers’ graves, that I may rebuild it.” ”
As Nehemiah poured out his heart before the king, the king could see that this was more than just a moment for Nehemiah to vent his feelings. It was clear that Nehemiah felt burdened to act on what was troubling him. And the king asked Nehemiah the kind of question that everyone on this earth at the time would have given just about anything to be asked. He asked, "What are you requesting?"
Keep in mind that at this point in history, Artaxerxes was not just a powerful king, he was the most powerful king on the earth. At his disposal were armies, money, people and resources that were required by law to obey his directives. No one had as much at their disposal as Artaxerxes and no one on earth could command as much to take place as he could.
Nehemiah knew that for the work that needed to be done in Jerusalem to be accomplished, he would need the help and favor of the king. And we can see here that the Lord had been working in the king's heart to be favorably disposed to help Nehemiah and the mission that God had entrusted to Nehemiah's oversight.
So when the king asked Nehemiah, "What are you requesting?," Nehemiah did something that I'm guessing many of us can identify with. He quickly prayed. Can you identify with this? Has your car ever hydroplaned or slipped on ice and you've prayed, "Lord, help!"? Has one of your small children ever slipped away from you and for a moment you experienced the fear of having no idea where they were? That's another "Lord, help!" kind of moment.
Some people mistakenly believe that for prayer to be effective, it needs to be accompanied by a display of your grasp of the English language from the Shakespearian era. I know a man who is a genuinely nice guy, but he speaks "everyman's English." He uses a lot of slang and the kind of vernacular that makes it very easy to pinpoint that he's from a particular region of NY. But when he's asked to pray out loud in front of a group, he turns into an orator with a mastery of Old English. Every reference to "you" is changed to "thee" and every verb receives the suffix "est". Know becomes "knowest". Think becomes "thinkest." But what did Jesus tell us in Mark 12:38-40?
“Jesus also taught: “Beware of these teachers of religious law! For they like to parade around in flowing robes and receive respectful greetings as they walk in the marketplaces. And how they love the seats of honor in the synagogues and the head table at banquets. Yet they shamelessly cheat widows out of their property and then pretend to be pious by making long prayers in public. Because of this, they will be more severely punished.””
The point is that the Lord isn't impressed by a show. Your prayers and my prayers don't have to be long and showy to be genuine. The Lord invites us to come into His presence, confident that because of the shed blood of Jesus, we're welcomed before Him. And He invites us to appreciate Him, confess to Him, thank Him and make requests of Him. It doesn't have to be complicated or fancy. It just has to be genuine. Nehemiah made a genuine, but quick request before the Lord that was in line with the Lord's will. The Lord delights to say "yes" to requests that are in line with His purposes and plans.
Your faithfulness can be used by God to accomplish great things
“While walking by the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon (who is called Peter) and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea, for they were fishermen. And he said to them, “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.” Immediately they left their nets and followed him.”
The character, faithfulness and reputation that the Lord creates in your life once you follow Him can be a very useful tool in His hand to accomplish His purposes on this earth. Reputation is an important thing and our reputation is forged in the minds of others not based on what we say or claim to believe, but by how we act on those beliefs.
Nehemiah loved the Lord and took steps of faith as the Lord directed him. Peter and Andrew responded in faith when Jesus invited them to follow Him. The Lord can use our lives as well to do great and mighty things when we submit our will, ambitions, and dreams to His Lordship. If He impresses upon your heart to act, will you act? If He tells you to move, will you go? If there's a task He sets in your mind to accomplish, will you obey Him?
When I was in college, the Lord changed my plans. At the time, I was studying to become a history teacher, but then I got hired by a local church as their youth director, and I would often preach for the senior pastor when he went a way. Through that experience, and through the encouragement of other Christian leaders and friends, the Lord made it clear to me that He was calling me to serve as a pastor instead.
I was friends with another pastor, a man named Gene Martin who was the pastor of Newtown Community Church, and I told him about my change of plans. He replied, "That's great news. Do me a favor. Start showing up at my church on occasion. I'm getting ready to retire and I'd like my congregation to get to know you a little. I'm going to recommend they call you to serve here once I'm gone."
I loved that idea, and I spent much of my remaining time in college daydreaming about the possibility of serving at his church. The timing of his retirement didn't end up lining up with my graduation like he initially thought, so I accepted the call to serve elsewhere, but the idea of serving at his church never left my mind. Looking back, I believe that was the seed of an idea God was planting in my heart.
After Gene eventually retired, Newtown Community Church went through a series of leadership changes and short-term pastoral tenures. In the midst of all that transition, the church lost momentum and eventually trickled down to just a few people. That small group reached out to a mission board I was serving on and asked for some guidance. They asked, "Should we officially close the church and sell the building? Could the proceeds be used toward mission work and church planting? Could a new church be planted here?"
The remnant of people who were left invited the mission board to meet with them, so we drove down and met. Some of the problems the church was facing were obvious, others weren't as clear. There were about six adults still committed to the ministry and they were open to suggestions. I remember saying at the time that I wish I could be two people. One to continue serving with the ministry I was serving at, and another who could come and attempt to plant the new church. The more I prayed about it through, the more the Lord made it clear to me that He was calling me to leave familiar and comfortable surroundings, uproot my family, move to Langhorne, Pennsylvania, and attempt to replant the church and build something new in partnership with the remnant of people who were left.
After praying as a family and seeking the advice of trusted friends and mentors, the Lord made it clear to each of us that this was His will, so we enthusiastically took that step of faith, sold our home, and moved to the new community. We spent the first two years attempting to build up a core group of leaders and volunteers while making some updates and changes to the building. Then, in September 2010, we gave the church its new name, Core Creek Community Church, and announced our grand opening to the community.
I remember those initial years vividly and fondly. We watched as the congregation grew from less than 10 people, to 20, 40, 65, back to 40, then 70 and 80. I remember looking at the empty parking lot and praying that the Lord would one day fill it with people longing to hear the message of the Gospel and desirous of trusting and following Jesus.
In the meantime, the Lord has answered those prayers. He's rewarded steps of faith that our family, the initial group of volunteers, and the ongoing chain of church members have taken throughout the years. Just last week, 171 people joined us for worship. We completely ran out of parking. And more people than ever, both adults and children, have been coming to faith in Jesus and surrendering their lives over to His leadership and care.
I share all of that to celebrate the work the Lord has done and the work He's continuing to do. I also want to express this personal testimony as something I hope you'll think about if the Lord ever asks you to interrupt your routine to answer His calling to build or rebuild. We celebrate Nehemiah's faith and obedience. We celebrate Peter and Andrew's response to Christ's invitation as well. Let's use their stories to inspire steps of faith in our lives as well.
Here's what the Lord has shown us in the process of saying "yes" to His calling.
It wasn't easy, but it has been good.
He will make you strong when you need strength and provide encouragement when you're feeling low.
He will surround you with people who are willing to join you on the mission.
He is responsible for the fruit that comes from the labor. Some of that fruit is obvious and can be easily counted, but most of that fruit isn't something you can easily count or quantify because it's fruit that's operating on a spiritual level that you may not be able to directly observe.
You can trust Jesus with your life and what He chooses to do with it.
So if the Lord ever impresses upon your heart to go in a direction that may stretch you, to build or rebuild something, make up your mind ahead of time to respond favorably. He will use your life to directly impact others, and that impact is something that will most certainly have positive eternal consequences. When you look back over the long-term results that come from obeying the Lord when He asks you to take steps of faith, I think you'll be able to testify, just like Nehemiah did, that the good hand of your God was upon your life.
© John Stange, 2022
