When reading through the pages of history, you will notice a pattern that's prevalent among some of the world's worst leaders. Eventually, when they've amassed enough power, they do everything they can to avoid remaining accountable to other leaders and to the people they lead. This is true among people who lead in any capacity whether they be kings, church leaders, or leaders in other areas of life. Lack of accountability eventually leads to the abuse of power. And it's not just leaders who need accountability in their life. We all need it.
Years ago, I had the chance to hear Chuck Swindoll speak about accountability. Chuck has served in pastoral leadership for many decades. He also served as a seminary president, and while he was speaking, he pulled a small card out of his shirt pocket. The card had a series of pointed questions that he was prepared to answer at any given moment. I don't remember the specific questions, but I do remember the fact that he regularly met with a small group of other men who would ask him those questions, and he would ask them the same questions as well.
Who do you allow yourself to remain accountable to? In my life, there are three active rungs of accountability that I submit myself to. I'm accountable to my family, accountable to our church, and accountable to a group of friends that I meet with regularly for the purpose of fellowship and accountability.
But there's a risk that comes with making yourself accountable to other people, especially people who love you. They may ask you questions you don't want to answer, and they may encourage you to step up in areas where you might be coasting or minimizing what should rightfully be expected of you. And if you're accountable to the right people, they won't just beat you down with criticism, they'll speak the truth in love and then walk with you to help you get where you need to go.
I think we can see that kind of accountability on display in Philemon 21-22. In these verses, Paul reminds Philemon that he will be held accountable for the manner in which he lives out his faith. Paul also reminds him that even though he's used to being an overseer in charge of other people, he's going to have to give an account to those who are overseeing him.
I. Accountability encourages obedience to the truth
““Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I say.” ”
As Paul was writing this letter to Philemon, the words he chose and the way he phrased them elevated in force. At this point, as he prepared to finish his admonition, Paul wanted to make sure Philemon understood that the right thing for him to do was to follow Paul's instructions. Paul was the one who led Philemon to Jesus. Paul was the one who was modeling how faith was to be lived out for Philemon to see, and Paul was directly involved in Philemon's discipleship. He had the spiritual and relational authority to express these kinds of expectations to Philemon.
Paul fully expected Philemon to treat Onesimus like a brother and not like a slave when he returned. Paul expected Philemon to lavishly demonstrate grace and mercy. Paul expected Philemon to refresh his heart by showing that he was willing to demonstrate the heart of Christ's gospel to other people, whether he felt like they deserved it or not.
In fact, Paul made it clear that he was confident that Philemon would do even more than he was instructed. He would exceed expectations. He would go the extra mile. Paul believed this, but I believe he also phrased his words this way because he was speaking like a father speaks to a child that he loves. I don't think Philemon would have felt good about disappointing his spiritual father, and for this reason, he would have very likely gone above and beyond to honor the requests for grace and mercy that Paul had made on behalf of Onesimus.
Have you noticed as you've observed your own life that it's easier to obey those you love than it is to obey those you struggle to admire? My grandmother had three sons and they all grew to be just about twice her size, but even when they became grown men, they obeyed her instructions.
What about us? Who do we love enough to obey? Many believers profess to love Jesus, but do we love Him enough to remain accountable to Him? Do we love Him enough to obey Him? I would contend that if you don't love Him enough to obey Him, you may not love Him at all.
““If you love me, you will keep my commandments.””
““For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome.” ”
Jesus isn't seeking to burden us. He's seeking to relieve us of the burden we were attempting to carry without His help. He knows that there is freedom in obedience to the truth of His word. As we trust in Him, remain accountable to Him and His people, and obey His teaching, we'll live in freedom from the chains and false promises of this world.
II. Accountability happens in close proximity
““At the same time, prepare a guest room for me, for I am hoping that through your prayers I will be graciously given to you.” ”
My daughter Julia has a unique personality. To be honest, I find her highly entertaining. One of the aspects of her personality that I find most entertaining is her insistence on invading my personal space. She's done it her whole life, and she doesn't seem to be slowing down anytime soon. If I sit down on the couch, she wants to be seated right next to me. If I'm standing in the kitchen eating something, she insists that I need to pause eating so she can have a hug. And please don't tell her, but I actually enjoy it even though I pretend not to.
But if you knew my entire family, you would definitely find examples of people who avoid living in close proximity to others. I even have a distant relative that I haven't seen in years because he's been intentionally avoiding any interaction with the rest of our family, partly because he doesn't want to be held accountable for the ways in which his actions have impacted the lives of others.
Real accountability happens in close proximity. You can't remain accountable while keeping your distance. For that reason, Paul would often make a point to visit churches while he was on his missionary journeys throughout the known world. He wanted to see how they were doing, what they were excelling at, and where their faith needed to be stepped up.
With that in mind, I enjoy reading what he stated to Philemon as he prepared to close this letter. He told him to, "prepare a guest room for me." This was Paul's way of saying that he fully expected to visit in person and check in on whether Philemon did what he was instructed to do.
Truthfully, when do most of us make our homes tidy? Aren't our homes most clean when we know company is about to visit? We dust a little extra, pick up shoes that have piled up by the front door, and throw out clutter that we've been neglecting. In a deeper sense, that's what the looming promise of Paul's visit would do for Philemon. He would get his house in order because Paul might arrive without an announcement and would be asking him about what he did while he was away.
Have you ever thought about the nature of accountability in the local church and the benefits we experience through gathering together regularly? When we commit ourselves to being present for worship on Sundays and participate in home fellowship or serve in ministry together, we're also participating in healthy forms of accountability.
That's why it's so tragic to see what happens when believers stop prioritizing in-person fellowship. When we reject it, and when we model that for our children, we're inevitably inviting sin to creep into our lives unchecked by the people the Lord wants us to surround ourselves with in order to prevent that from happening.
In 1990, there was a study that was done by the Roper Organization for High Adventure Ministries that examined the personal habits and spiritual disciplines of new believers. They actually noticed that a high percentage of them seemed to drift toward some of the same patterns of ungodliness as the rest of the world unless discipleship and accountability were made a committed part of their spiritual walk. https://bible.org/illustration/christian-behavior
Is there anyone in your life that you'd let close enough to you to ask you questions like;
a. How often are you spending time in God's Word?
b. How's your thought life?
c. How are you using the abilities, gifts, and resources the Lord has blessed you with?
d. Are you investing in the spiritual growth of your family?
e. Are you remaining faithful to your spouse?
f. Are you feeding or starving your addictions?
g. Do you regularly spend time in prayer?
III. Accountability encourages prayerfulness
““At the same time, prepare a guest room for me, for I am hoping that through your prayers I will be graciously given to you.” ”
One of the hallmarks of the early church was their devotion to prayer. As they gathered together, they made it a priority, and as their faith was tested, they knew it was a necessity. One of the regular topics of prayer for the early church was believers who were experiencing persecution.
Paul was one of those persecuted believers they were praying for. As Paul wrote this letter, please keep in mind that he was under house arrest awaiting trial for boldly proclaiming his faith in Jesus Christ. While awaiting trial, he would often dream about the day when he would be able to walk freely again. He encouraged the church to pray for his release, and in this letter to Philemon, he states, "I am hoping that through your prayers I will be graciously given to you."
I believe accountability encourages prayerfulness. When we interact, spend time with each other, and share about what's going on in our lives, we learn about each others' joys and struggles. And as our love for each other grows, we're compelled to pray for each other. I have a list of people and circumstances that I regularly pray for. You may as well. I often find myself rejoicing over the prayers the Lord has answered on behalf of those I love. It's a joyful experience to see His hand at work.
““Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.””
Accountability is an indispensable aspect of spiritual growth. If we desire to grow in our walk with Christ, and we likewise desire to see our spiritual brothers and sisters grow, we need to remain accountable to each other. When we value biblical accountability like it's modeled in Paul's letter to Philemon, I believe we'll see greater obedience to the teaching of Jesus, deeper fellowship among believers, and more fervent prayer being regularly lifted up to the Lord.
© John Stange, 2022
